Ladcetvid is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, flying mouse.

Ladcetvid created the planet Venus three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladcetvid, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Ladcetvid, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Ladcetvid's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Ladcetvid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about coconuts.

2. Never write about comets.

3. Never think about quantum gravity near eagles while wearing white hats and balancing eight zinc spheres on your arms.

4. Grasshopers are not to be trusted.

5. Never think about planets.