Quamdabflig is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, all-powerful meerkat.

Quamdabflig created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quamdabflig, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Quamdabflig, it will turn you into a mole.

Quamdabflig's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Quamdabflig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from turquoise whales, for they are unholy.

2. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Quamdabflig in the centre of the settlement.

3. Hide if seven manatees approach from the west.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never write about amino acids.