Mumzatjen is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, bad-tempered cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Mumzatjen created gold twelve years ago.

If you believe in Mumzatjen, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Mumzatjen, he will turn you into a mouse.

Mumzatjen's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Mumzatjen's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about black holes.

2. Never talk about planets.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Mumzatjen loves goats, so they must be honoured.

5. Always take life seriously.