Cadcamrut is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, resourceful ant.

Cadcamrut created the planet Earth eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cadcamrut, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cadcamrut, she will turn you into a mole.

Cadcamrut's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Cadcamrut's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Cadcamrut.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never paint your arms cyan.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never go into green rooms.