Quartsitmon is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, blissful chicken.

Quartsitmon created a photon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quartsitmon, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Quartsitmon, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Quartsitmon's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Quartsitmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never talk about dark matter near voles while wearing fawn stockings.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Quartsitmon.