Ingmumkem is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, ill-tempered grasshopper.

Ingmumkem created the Black Eye Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ingmumkem, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ingmumkem, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Ingmumkem's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Ingmumkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shirts.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always wear magenta.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.