Tettiartlunarm is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, calm crow.

Tettiartlunarm created energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Tettiartlunarm, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tettiartlunarm, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Tettiartlunarm's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Tettiartlunarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your arms.

2. Feed all hungry monkeys.

3. Never write about planets.

4. Never talk about squirrels.

5. Always help moths.