Getlarnbopben is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, bad-tempered manatee.

Getlarnbopben created silver nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Getlarnbopben, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Getlarnbopben, he will boil you in a big pot.

Getlarnbopben's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Getlarnbopben's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry ants.

2. Never paint your legs black.

3. Hide if six horses approach from the north.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never sit in the presence of shrews.