Cabjanvig Gemominrut Yokstigget is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, competent ant.

Cabjanvig Gemominrut Yokstigget created dark matter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Cabjanvig Gemominrut Yokstigget, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Cabjanvig Gemominrut Yokstigget, she will destroy your home solar system.

Cabjanvig Gemominrut Yokstigget's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Cabjanvig Gemominrut Yokstigget's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not wear brown clothing.

4. Never talk about dark energy.

5. Do not keep nine voles in a large pit.