Sigflatlarp is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, tiresome bear.

Sigflatlarp created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigflatlarp, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Sigflatlarp, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Sigflatlarp's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Sigflatlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always obey Sigflatlarp's priests.

4. Feed all hungry swans.

5. Never go into red rooms.