Beggoddiss is a god.

She takes the form of a large, selfish goat.

Beggoddiss created Africa three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Beggoddiss, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Beggoddiss, she will turn you into a worm.

Beggoddiss' most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Beggoddiss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never think about chlorophyll.

3. Never hurt tapirs.

4. Never write about dwarf planets.

5. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Beggoddiss in the centre of the settlement.