Madboggar is a god.

He takes the form of a large, selfish scorpion.

Madboggar created humanity five million years ago.

If you believe in Madboggar, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Madboggar, he will turn you into a puffin.

Madboggar's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Madboggar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Erect a giant violet sculpture of Madboggar in the centre of the settlement.