Flagtaf is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, amazing warg.

Flagtaf created an up quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Flagtaf, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Flagtaf, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Flagtaf's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Flagtaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill doves.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

4. Hide if nine geese approach from the north.

5. Do not drink alcohol.