Fedmislimjapflowyakbam is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, dishonest chinchilla.

Fedmislimjapflowyakbam created a quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Fedmislimjapflowyakbam, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fedmislimjapflowyakbam, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Fedmislimjapflowyakbam's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Fedmislimjapflowyakbam's Holy Commandments

1. Sheep are not to be trusted.

2. Never think about quantum gravity near doves while wearing orange shoes and balancing five gold spheres on your arms.

3. Do not keep eight gulls in a large pit.

4. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Do not wear blue clothing.