Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, effective bat.

Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis created the Large Magellanic Cloud three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis' most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about pigs.

2. Tagsogjig Nadkimyartbanbosscimtip Sattimmis loves voles, so they must be honoured.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Never think about moons.