Vilbabnultetti is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, unjust wombat.

Vilbabnultetti created viruses seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vilbabnultetti, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vilbabnultetti, she will not care at all.

Vilbabnultetti's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Vilbabnultetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never think about special relativity.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.

5. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.