Pibjatpad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, overgenerous wolf.

Pibjatpad created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pibjatpad, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Pibjatpad, it will turn you into a mole.

Pibjatpad's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Pibjatpad's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not take Pibjatpad's name in vain.

3. Do not kill great tits.

4. Do not shave your feet.

5. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Pibjatpad in the centre of the settlement.