Vadloglammob is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, witty turtle.

Vadloglammob created snails two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vadloglammob, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vadloglammob, she will try to impress you with trees.

Vadloglammob's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Vadloglammob's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick eagles.

2. Run away from turquoise frogs, for they are unholy.

3. Vadloglammob loves birds, so they must be honoured.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never feed parsnips to nematodes while wearing red tights.