Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, vain deer.

Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill created a bottom quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill, she will turn you into a slug.

Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate badgers.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill.

3. Never eat rice.

4. Do not eat corn.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Witruttvengabrig Wanlinrill.