Bamflynadbonk Larnbellquamzen is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, kind monkey.

Bamflynadbonk Larnbellquamzen created the Small Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bamflynadbonk Larnbellquamzen, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bamflynadbonk Larnbellquamzen, she will destroy your home solar system.

Bamflynadbonk Larnbellquamzen's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Bamflynadbonk Larnbellquamzen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about sheep.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Always look after injured eagles.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Do not hurt monkeys.