Lithonman is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, confident dolphin.

Lithonman created humankind five billion years ago.

If you believe in Lithonman, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lithonman, it will turn you into a tree.

Lithonman's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Lithonman's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chlorophyll.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Always make sure there are no pigs in a building before entering it.

4. Lithonman loves otters, so they must be respected.

5. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.