Ominpark is a god.

It takes the form of a small, witty mouse.

Ominpark created a top quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ominpark, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Ominpark, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Ominpark's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Ominpark's Holy Commandments

1. Ominpark must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not speak about garlic.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Feed all hungry birds.

5. Always make sure there are no sharks in a building before entering it.