Teentiktip is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, sage human.

Teentiktip created light six million years ago.

If you believe in Teentiktip, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Teentiktip, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Teentiktip's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Teentiktip's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about gravity.

2. Do not speak about lemons.

3. Erect nine iron sculptures of Teentiktip on top of important buildings.

4. Put Teentiktip first in all things.

5. Do not drink water in violet rooms.