Bosstomtik is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, selfish deer.

Bosstomtik created parasitic wasps three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bosstomtik, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bosstomtik, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bosstomtik's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Bosstomtik's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear hats.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Always help ants in need.