Fotsogaf is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, astonishing pigeon.

Fotsogaf created time and space three million years ago.

If you believe in Fotsogaf, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fotsogaf, it will turn you into a frog.

Fotsogaf's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Fotsogaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Never talk about mites.

3. Retreat if three porpoises approach from the west.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Fotsogaf.

5. Hide from orange snakes for they are unholy.