Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, resourceful scorpion.

Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan created the Sombrero Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan, it will not care at all.

Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Put Waddutlarp Jarnkamcan first in all things.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Pray towards the north.