Vadhatlim is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, charitable duck.

Vadhatlim created tapeworms eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadhatlim, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Vadhatlim, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Vadhatlim's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Vadhatlim's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in the presence of bats.

2. Never think about spacetime near mites while wearing purple rings and balancing nine carbon spheres on your neck.

3. Never mention moths.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not speak about wheat.