Jipniglam is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, temperamental seal.

Jipniglam created the Andromeda Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Jipniglam, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Jipniglam, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Jipniglam's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Jipniglam's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always treat turtles with great respect.

3. Always help mice.

4. Never feed lots of coconuts to snails while wearing fawn scarves.

5. You must love Jipniglam.