Yattlimbap Gutjamdod is a god.

It takes the form of a small, narcissistic lizard.

Yattlimbap Gutjamdod created humankind two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattlimbap Gutjamdod, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yattlimbap Gutjamdod, it will turn you into a plant.

Yattlimbap Gutjamdod's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Yattlimbap Gutjamdod's Holy Commandments

1. Always help grasshopers in need.

2. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Yattlimbap Gutjamdod.

4. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Yattlimbap Gutjamdod loves pigs, so they must be respected.