Sitsasteen Fadpidmob is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, narcissistic otter.

Sitsasteen Fadpidmob created an up quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitsasteen Fadpidmob, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Sitsasteen Fadpidmob, he will destroy your home planet.

Sitsasteen Fadpidmob's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Sitsasteen Fadpidmob's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never feed coconuts to tapirs while wearing purple skirts.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Sitsasteen Fadpidmob loves bats, so they must be respected.

5. Put Sitsasteen Fadpidmob first in all things.