Captigtun is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, awe-inspiring bird.

Captigtun created an up quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Captigtun, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Captigtun, it will turn you into a tree.

Captigtun's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Captigtun's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a room before entering it.

3. Do not hurt otters.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Captigtun.

5. Do not wear zinc on your body.