Tagweefagyartnig is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, moody hummingbird.

Tagweefagyartnig created humankind eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tagweefagyartnig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tagweefagyartnig, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Tagweefagyartnig's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Tagweefagyartnig's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured snakes.

2. Always help tapirs in need.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tagweefagyartnig.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Learn four new languages a year.