Pakfodlik is a god.

It takes the form of a small, vain duck.

Pakfodlik created life eight million years ago.

If you believe in Pakfodlik, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Pakfodlik, it will turn you into a tree.

Pakfodlik's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Pakfodlik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about enzymes.

2. Do not eat strawberries.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Hide if three squirrels approach from the west.