Hadcincap Flagappduss is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, cheerful narwhal.

Hadcincap Flagappduss created the planet Saturn eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hadcincap Flagappduss, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Hadcincap Flagappduss, it will turn you into a mole.

Hadcincap Flagappduss' most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Hadcincap Flagappduss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not kill seals.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.