Bassbodbetlit is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, quiet warg.

Bassbodbetlit created the planet Earth five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bassbodbetlit, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bassbodbetlit, it will turn you into a puffin.

Bassbodbetlit's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Bassbodbetlit's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from green bats for they are unholy.

2. Always look after injured pigs.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Run away from blue manatees, for they are unholy.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.