Nurlbonkkon Volmetrul is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, unselfish coyote.

Nurlbonkkon Volmetrul created the planet Venus twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nurlbonkkon Volmetrul, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nurlbonkkon Volmetrul, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Nurlbonkkon Volmetrul's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Nurlbonkkon Volmetrul's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not dye your hair gray.

4. Feed all hungry badgers.

5. Always treat snails with great respect.