Zimrakrak is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, weak dragonfly.

Zimrakrak created the universe eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimrakrak, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Zimrakrak, he will torture you forever.

Zimrakrak's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Zimrakrak's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zimrakrak.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near whales while wearing mauve dresses and balancing eight carbon spheres on your arms.

3. Never leap in holy places.

4. Always help swans.

5. Always pray immersed in water.