Barnrapranquill is a god.

It takes the form of a small, awesome cow.

Barnrapranquill created water four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Barnrapranquill, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Barnrapranquill, it will destroy your home planet.

Barnrapranquill's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Barnrapranquill's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not kill sharks.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Run away if three frogs approach from the south.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.