Xembepdudgilmat is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, amazing squirrel.

Xembepdudgilmat created the world three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xembepdudgilmat, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Xembepdudgilmat, she will send minions to preach to you.

Xembepdudgilmat's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Xembepdudgilmat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not run in public.

2. Never talk about dolphins.

3. Hide if six squirrels approach from the west.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Xembepdudgilmat on top of all buildings.

5. Feed all hungry dogs.