Bastlapdin Damstigmet is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, tiresome jellyfish.

Bastlapdin Damstigmet created oxygen three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastlapdin Damstigmet, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Bastlapdin Damstigmet, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Bastlapdin Damstigmet's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bastlapdin Damstigmet's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. You must never eat cucumbers.

4. Never hop in the presence of otters.

5. Worship no other gods but Bastlapdin Damstigmet.