Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, uncaring mouse.

Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem created the Sun three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump near aardvarks.

2. Do not speak about melons.

3. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Worship no other gods but Lagflagfarbet Vabbapxem.