Vigquamrag is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, dishonest camel.

Vigquamrag created humankind six billion years ago.

If you believe in Vigquamrag, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Vigquamrag, he will strike you with lightening.

Vigquamrag's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Vigquamrag's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from fawn turtles for they are unholy.

2. Always wear brown.

3. Do not take Vigquamrag's name in vain.

4. Feed all hungry dogs.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.