Pomfadcin Kikmobnab is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, kind sheep.

Pomfadcin Kikmobnab created an up quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pomfadcin Kikmobnab, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Pomfadcin Kikmobnab, she will think nothing of it.

Pomfadcin Kikmobnab's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Pomfadcin Kikmobnab's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Pomfadcin Kikmobnab.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near rats while wearing yellow hats and balancing three carbon spheres on your face.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Run away from blue gulls, for they are unholy.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Pomfadcin Kikmobnab.