Zedbagbonkxuctitdag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, emotional wolf.

Zedbagbonkxuctitdag created a charm quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zedbagbonkxuctitdag, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Zedbagbonkxuctitdag, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Zedbagbonkxuctitdag's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Zedbagbonkxuctitdag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick otters.

2. Never think about ultrasonics.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not shave your chest.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.