Gesspibtongubkan is a god.
It takes the form of a minute, self-confident
narwhal.
Gesspibtongubkan created gold two million years ago.
If you believe in
Gesspibtongubkan, it will look after you all your life.
If you do not believe in
Gesspibtongubkan, it will turn you into a hamster.
Gesspibtongubkan's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.
Gesspibtongubkan's Holy Commandments1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.
2. Fast once a month.
3. Retreat if three dolphins approach from the east.
4. Never sprint near shrews.
5. Never pour water over plants.