Nulfubflow is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, witty monkey.

Nulfubflow created viruses three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nulfubflow, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nulfubflow, she will turn you into a puffin.

Nulfubflow's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Nulfubflow's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Nulfubflow in the centre of the settlement.

4. You must love Nulfubflow.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nulfubflow.