Rigpibfit is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, all-knowing crocodile.

Rigpibfit created humankind four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rigpibfit, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Rigpibfit, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Rigpibfit's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Rigpibfit's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry gulls.

2. Run away if four mice approach from the south.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Do not cook food in pots.