Zenarnsit is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, uncaring shrew.

Zenarnsit created the planet Earth three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zenarnsit, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Zenarnsit, it will torture you forever.

Zenarnsit's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Zenarnsit's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Zenarnsit on top of all buildings.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not speak about corn.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.