Xemcensannig is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, cheerful goat.

Xemcensannig created an atom three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xemcensannig, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Xemcensannig, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Xemcensannig's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Xemcensannig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. You must love Xemcensannig.

5. Always make sure there are no great tits in a room before entering it.