Abrigdonhig is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, selfish squirrel.

Abrigdonhig created the planet Venus twelve years ago.

If you believe in Abrigdonhig, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Abrigdonhig, it will jump up and down on your head.

Abrigdonhig's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Abrigdonhig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics near turtles while wearing magenta kilts and balancing six nickel spheres on your arms.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always treat squirrels with great respect.